Dingo Was His Name-O: An A to Z Challenge Shenanigan

By Colby Marshall - April 4, 2013

Once upon a time, on my blog’s old home, Spittin’ Out Words Like a Llama, I ran a feature I liked to call Animal Cool-ety, which dealt with the controversial topic of cool-ety to animals.  Yep, that’s right.  I call out animals on their bullshit, and after I’m finished giving them a thorough reaming, I declare whether they are cool, lukewarm, or just plain awful.   It was one of my favorite features, which is why when the first “D” word that popped to mind was dingo, I didn’t bat an eye.  After all, what better sign from the universe (or from my twisted little brain) that I should bring back Animal Cool-ety.  So, here we go, then: a cool-ety assessment for the dingo.

Oh, the poor, poor dingo.  Not only does his name make him sound ridiculous and unintelligent, a sort of takeoff of the urban slang “dingbat,” which is used to describe something foolish, but he has also been painted by the modern media as a vicious, evil child-killer.  And while, yes, some of his cousins have been known to be responsible for killing a child here or a child there, it is no different than that strange cousin of yours who happens to have more of a taste for Aunt Clara than for Aunt Clara’s veal, if you get my drift.  That certainly doesn’t mean that you want to sample Aunt Clara leg with a side of mashed potatoes, does it?  I didn’t think so!  Why is okay for everyone to judge him based on the poor behavior of his distant relatives?

And not only has this ridiculous insinuation that the dingo is a malicious infant murderer gotten so out of hand that it’s now a joke on national television and in pop culture (like this example), but the dingo is forced to listen to cute little nursery songs that would’ve fit him perfectly be bastardized with another name simply because no one likes him.  While the kids skip around the schoolyard and sing, “There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-o,” the D-I-N-G-O sits across the parking lot—honoring the restraining order the school has against him that requires him to stay 100 feet away from children at all times—and cries.

Haven’t we had enough of the discrimination?  Aren’t we ready to stand up and say the dingo has been unfairly stereotyped and we’re not going to take it anymore?  The dingo is cool, no matter what Seinfeld tries to tell you!

Can you think of any other animals who have bad raps?  Are the deserved or not?